Imani could see where this was going, but she stayed quiet, letting him tell it.
«One of the matches fell onto my bedspread. It caught. I tried to put it out, but it spread so fast. Within seconds, the whole bed was on fire, then the curtains, then the walls.» Damon’s breathing was getting faster. «I ran to get Aria. I thought we could get out together, but the smoke was so thick, and the heat was so intense, and I was just a kid…»
«Damon?»
«My dad came home early. He heard us screaming. He ran into the house and got us out.» Damon’s voice broke. «But then he went back for our pet. It was a kitten that we had just acquired a month prior. It was so precious to Aria and me.»
Imani felt tears burning in her eyes.
«The house started collapsing while he was inside. We heard him screaming. We heard…» Damon stopped, unable to continue for a moment. When he spoke again, his voice was barely a whisper. «Aria ran back toward the house. She was trying to save him. I tried to grab her, but I was too slow. The front wall collapsed on her.»
«Oh my God.»
«My dad died in the fire. Aria died three hours later in the hospital. My mom…» Damon’s hands were shaking badly now. «My mom had a complete mental breakdown. She couldn’t look at me, couldn’t stand to be in the same room with me. I’d killed her husband and her daughter, destroyed her entire world.»
«It was an accident. You were a child.»
«It doesn’t matter,» Damon’s voice was harsh. «I caused it. My recklessness. My stupidity. My complete inability to follow simple rules. So my mom signed over custody to my uncle, my dad’s estranged brother who I’d met maybe twice. He was a billionaire, already made his fortune in tech.»
«Did you ever see your mom again?»
«Once, at the funeral. She looked at me like I was a monster, like I’d personally murdered her family. I’ve never forgotten that look.» Damon’s eyes were distant, reliving that moment. «My uncle raised me, gave me everything money could buy, sent me to the best schools, and left me his entire fortune when he died five years ago. But he never let me forget what I’d done. What I’d destroyed.»
Imani’s heart was breaking for this man who’d been carrying this guilt for almost 25 years.
«Is that why you have OCD?» Imani asked gently. «The need for control?»
«The psychiatrists say it’s a trauma response. I lost control once and it destroyed everything. Now I can’t tolerate even the smallest chaos. Everything has to be perfect, ordered, clean, safe.» Damon’s laugh was hollow. «The OCD is my punishment, my prison, and I deserve it.»
«That’s not true.»
«It is true. I killed two people, Imani, because I couldn’t follow one simple rule.» Damon finally looked at her, and his eyes were full of self-loathing. «So yes, I deserve to live like this, in a sterile cage of my own making. It’s the least I can do.»
Imani stood up and walked around the desk. Damon watched her warily. She held out her hand.
«What are you doing?» Damon asked.
«Give me your hand.»
«Imani…»
«Just do it.»
Slowly, Damon placed his hand in hers. The thrilling sensation was there, just like always, but this time Imani didn’t let it distract her. She squeezed his hand gently.
«You were eight years old. A child. What happened was a tragic accident, but it wasn’t your fault. You didn’t murder anyone. You didn’t destroy anything on purpose. You were just a kid who made a mistake.»
«You don’t understand.»
«I understand that you’ve been punishing yourself for 24 years for something that wasn’t your fault. I understand that your mom was grieving and in pain, but she shouldn’t have looked at you that way. I understand that your uncle should have gotten you therapy instead of just throwing money at you.» Imani’s voice was firm. «And I understand that living in this perfect prison isn’t honoring your father and sister. It’s just slowly killing you.»
Damon’s eyes were bright with unshed tears. «I can’t let go of the control.»
«If you do, you won’t burn down the world. You’ll just start living in it again.»
They stood like that for a long moment, hands clasped, something profound passing between them. Then Damon pulled his hand away gently.
«Thank you,» he said. «For listening.»
«You’re welcome.»
Imani turned to leave, but Damon’s voice stopped her.
«Imani, tomorrow is Sunday. Your day off. Would you…?» He hesitated. «Would you mind if I came with you to visit your mother?»
Imani turned back, surprised. «You want to come to the hospital?»
«I know I have issues with hospitals, germs, contamination, all of that. But I’d like to meet the woman who raised someone like you. If that’s okay.»
Something warm bloomed in Imani’s chest. «Yeah,» she said softly. «That would be okay.»
Sunday morning arrived cool and clear. Imani stood outside Cook County Hospital at 9:00 a.m., checking her phone. Damon had texted 20 minutes ago.
On my way. Traffic is heavy.
A sleek black car pulled up to the curb, and Damon emerged from the backseat. Imani’s breath caught. He looked good. He’d dressed down in dark jeans, a gray Henley, and a leather jacket. But it was his face that made Imani’s heart skip. He looked nervous.
«Hey,» Damon said, stopping a few feet away from her.
«Hey, yourself.» Imani noticed he was carrying a small bag. «What’s that?»
«Supplies.» Damon opened the bag to reveal hand sanitizer, disinfectant wipes, disposable gloves, and a spray bottle of something that probably killed every germ known to mankind. «I’m going into a hospital. I need to be prepared.»
Imani wanted to make fun of him, but the fact that he was facing one of his biggest fears just to meet her mother made her throat tight.
«You don’t have to do this, you know,» Imani said softly. «I know how hard this is for you.»
«I want to do this.» Damon met her eyes. «I want to meet the woman who raised someone strong enough to stand up to me.»
«She’s still pretty out of it from the medication. She might not even wake up.»
«That’s okay. I just want to be there. With you.»
The words hung between them. «Okay,» Imani said finally. «But if you need to leave at any point, just say the word. I’ll be fine.»
He wasn’t fine. Damon made it exactly 17 steps into the hospital before his breathing got shallow. He pulled out his own sanitizer and used it liberally, then snapped on a pair of disposable gloves.
The elevator was packed with people. Damon pressed himself into the corner, trying to minimize contact. His jaw was clenched so tight Imani could see the muscle jumping. When a nurse accidentally brushed against his arm, Damon flinched so hard he nearly hit the wall.
«Sorry,» the nurse said cheerfully, not noticing his distress.
Imani reached out and touched his hand, the small patch of skin between his glove and his jacket sleeve. Damon’s eyes met hers, and she saw the panic receding slightly.
«You’re doing great,» Imani whispered.
«I’m having a panic attack in an elevator. But you’re still here. That’s what counts.»
They made it to Mama Loretta’s room without Damon bolting. Mama Loretta was awake. For the first time since the surgery, her eyes were open and alert.
«Baby girl,» Mama said, her voice hoarse from the breathing tube. «Come here.»
Imani rushed to her mother’s bedside and carefully hugged her. «Mama, you’re awake. How do you feel?»
«Like I got hit by a truck, but I’m alive.» Mama’s eyes shifted to Damon, who was standing awkwardly by the door. «And who’s this handsome man you brought with you?»
Imani felt her face heat. «Mama, this is Damon. My boss.»
«Your boss.» Mama’s eyes sharpened despite her weakened state. «The one who paid my medical bills?»
«Yes, ma’am,» Damon said, stepping forward carefully. He didn’t extend his hand, but he nodded respectfully. «It’s an honor to meet you, Mrs. Banks. Your daughter speaks very highly of you.»
«Does she now?» Mama studied Damon with an intensity that made Imani nervous. Loretta Banks might be recovering from major surgery, but her mama-radar was still fully operational. «And how exactly does my daughter’s boss end up paying $300,000 in medical bills?»
Oh no.
«Mama, I told you I got a new job…»
«A job that pays $300,000 upfront? For a girl with no college degree?» Mama’s eyes never left Damon. «That’s not a job, baby. That’s something else entirely.»
Damon, to his credit, didn’t flinch. «Your daughter is working off the debt. She’s serving as my household manager for the next two years at an hourly rate that will cover the medical expenses.»
«Two years of servitude for my medical bills.» Mama’s voice was flat. «So you bought my daughter.»
«I didn’t buy…»
«You trapped her in a contract she couldn’t refuse because the alternative was letting me die.» Mama’s voice was getting stronger now, fueled by righteous anger. «That’s not generosity, Mr. Castellano. That’s coercion.»
The room fell silent. Imani had never heard anyone speak to Damon like that. Most people were too intimidated by his wealth. But Loretta Banks wasn’t scared.
«You’re right,» Damon said quietly.
Imani’s head whipped around to stare at him. «What?»
«Your mother is right. I did coerce you. I used your desperation against you to get what I wanted.» Damon’s voice was steady, but his eyes were pained. «At the time, I told myself it was just business. A transaction. But the truth is more complicated than that.»
«What truth?» Mama asked sharply.
Damon looked at Imani, and something vulnerable passed across his face.
«The truth is that your daughter is the only person who’s ever touched me without making me feel contaminated. The truth is that I trapped her in this arrangement because I’m selfish and broken, and I wanted to figure out why she affects me the way she does.» Damon turned back to Mama Loretta. «The truth is, I’m falling for your daughter, and I don’t know how to handle that without trying to control it.»
Imani forgot how to breathe. Did Damon just say he was falling for her?
Mama Loretta stared at Damon for a long moment. Then she said, «Sit down, Mr. Castellano. Let’s talk.»
Damon sat in the chair beside Mama’s bed, looking more nervous than Imani had ever seen him.
«You got OCD?» Mama asked bluntly.
«Yes, ma’am.»
«Trauma?»
«Yes.»
«You in therapy?»
«No.»
Mama’s expression said everything. «Why not?»
«Because I don’t deserve to get better. I caused a fire when I was eight years old that killed my father and my little sister. My OCD is my punishment for that.»
Mama was quiet for a moment. Then she said, «That’s the dumbest thing I’ve ever heard.»
Damon blinked. «Excuse me?»
«You heard me. Dumbest. Thing. Ever.» Mama shifted in her bed, wincing slightly. «You were a child. Children make mistakes. Tragic, awful mistakes sometimes, but mistakes nonetheless. Punishing yourself for the rest of your life doesn’t honor the people you lost. It just wastes the life you still have.»
«Mrs. Banks…»
«And using my daughter as some kind of guinea pig to figure out your feelings? That’s selfish and it’s wrong.» Mama’s eyes were fierce now. «But I can see you know that. I can see you feel guilty about it. So here’s what’s going to happen.»
Everyone waited.